Academy Forces Next James Bond to Be Disabled Lesbian Woman for Oscar Eligibility
Hollywood, CA – The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences has issued a directive which requires the next James Bond actor…
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European Commission Buys Extra Office Paper to Respond to Russian Drones in Poland with Protest Notes
BRUSSELS — The European Commission has authorized an emergency purchase of office paper after Russian drones crossed into Polish airspace this week….
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Trump Orders Shutdown of Duty-Free Stores to Enforce Tariff Restrictions
WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump announced that all duty-free stores in the United States should be shut down, arguing they allow foreign…
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California Appoints ChatGPT as Acting Judge Due to Judicial Staff Crisis
LOS ANGELES — The Los Angeles Superior Court appointed ChatGPT as acting judge for Department 42 Monday, marking the first time artificial…
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Trump Says Russia Presents No Issue Unless It Invades Czech Republic
WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump outlined his administration’s foreign policy stance regarding Russia during a White House press briefing Tuesday, declaring that…
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Eternal Rulers Club: China, Russia, India Launch “League of Dictatorship States”
BEIJING — Leaders from China, Russia, and India gathered in Beijing to announce the creation of a new alliance, informally dubbed the…
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Trump Directs Administration to Locate 3 Additional Wars to End, Says ‘Nobel Committee Will Have No Choice’
Washington, D.C., August 28, 2025 — President Donald Trump announced today a bold directive for his administration: locate three additional wars to…
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Trump Proposes Constitutional Reform to Establish Monarchy in the United States
WASHINGTON — President Donald J. Trump announced a proposal to replace the American democratic system with a monarchy, calling it a “bold…
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EU Parliament Forms 17 New Russia Sanctions Committees, Ukraine-Russia War to End by Thursday
BRUSSELS — The European Parliament has announced the creation of 17 new committees tasked with drafting sanctions against Russia. Officials confidently predicting…
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Russians Obtain Epstein Files; Putin Jokes About Replying to Melania’s Letter
MANHATTAN – Russian intelligence operatives obtained classified Jeffrey Epstein court documents after a federal judge accidentally left them on a Central Park…
